I'm so unhappy - It is a repeated pattern in my life. This is my fourth job and I seem to be a magnet for a bully. A man in my office (J) was very nice to me when I started. He is always friendly to me in public; making compliments about my appearance or what I am wearing. But, behind my back and when we are alone he is very nasty and criticizes my work. He is not the boss but the office manager (A) goes along with whatever he says. The other girls in the office all think that (J) is wonderful and a nice man. He makes light hearted remarks about me and says it is just a joke. I overheard him telling another secretary that (A) only hired me as “office candy” and that (A) has trouble with his wife. It’s just not true! (J) gave me a task to do but I can’t read the files and need MSProject software. He is supposed to be getting my computer validated on the office license but hasn’t done it and now he says I can’t do my job.
I have left two previous jobs because of stuff like this, the last one because of sexual harassment. People say I am good at my work but it always ends up the same. I had a really bad time with bullying at school and ended up being home educated by my sister. I just try to be nice to people and they are horrible back. The company has a secret “hot line” to report this. However, one girl reported (J) two years ago and he is still here. She was transferred to a dead end job in a place that meant a two hour commute.