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Can you help this person? They have a problem with
Office Romance and need some advice.


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This is the original problem from an employee...
Hi, everyone! Not sure what to do. I have two co-workers that are obviously attracted to each other. The problem is they are married to OTHER PEOPLE.

The woman confided in me that she has strong feelings for the guy, and that she can't stop thinking about him. She has had sexual dreams and fantasies about him. She is falling in love, she said. She has wondered if she should quit working for us because she does not want to cheat on her husband. I only told her to be careful with emotionally investing in someone else than her husband, and that whatever problems she is having in her marriage, they need to be addressed elsewhere.

Months passed and the flirtations grew stronger. Other co-workers began to notice as well, and some were uncomfortable being around them. My manager is oblivious to it all since he spends most of his time in his office.

Well, one day, we had a company picnic, and she showed up in a tight tank top showing major cleavage. I had never seen her dressed up like that before because she was very modest, but obviously she did it for the guy (who was giddy talking to her). I felt SO uncomfortable knowing that she is in love with him while his wife stood right next to them. I am angry at her because she continued to instigate such encounters with him instead of keeping her distance. He easily fell for it (I guess the cleavage helps).

Now the flirtations are becoming more obvious in the work place. I feel awful seeing their little side glances, the VERY close proximities they get to each other. The giggles and whispers. I am sure he feels the same way about her. Sometimes I'll happen upon them in a secluded hallway and they'll quickly hush up and walk away. Or instead of entering certain data that we need by the close of business, they will take their time visiting with each other, chatting, flirting, etc, while I have to finish the paperwork from such data before I go home. In other words, I have to wait ON them.

I feel I am in a moral and ethical dilemma. I don't want to see this at work. I don't know how to approach them or if I should just go straight to my boss. I don't want to tattle but I also shouldn't feel this awful knowing that they could be involved.

What should I do?  
Employee: anonymous
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A visitor of this site offers this as a possible solution...
I understand your dilemma, the same thing happened to me, but in my case it was my director who got engaged with a married guy that we technically worked with it went to an extend of almost killing the organization, because the director could not make her own decisive decision.

From my own point of view i would advice you to talk about it in a diplomatic manner, i know your involved colleague would be furious with you but it would be good for both of them, at the end of the day one of them would realize how helpful you and would definitely thank for that. If you don't bring it up that relationship would affect the productivity of the business and you would end up being the loser.
Contributor: visitor
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Disclaimer: The advice displayed within this site is not legal advice and is not to be taken as legal or professional advice in any way. Any communication within this forum is intended only to discuss a number of possible options. All ratings have come from site visitors and reflect a peer review only.


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